The fat suit is ‘in’
It seems Gwyneth Paltrow (“Shallow Hal”) and Mike Myers (Fat Bastard) were way ahead of the curve because this fall season everyone is wearing the fat suit!
In a desperate attempt at a topic for her new talk show, former supermodel and current Oprah Winfrey wannabe Tyra Banks recently put on some artificial layers before going undercover as a 350-lb woman for 15 whole hours.
(Side note: If you’re up for some great comedy, “The Tyra Banks Show” is an absolute flaming plane crash of a program. On it, she’s proved to people that she doesn’t have breast implants, she’s settled her cat fight with fellow model Naomi Campbell and this week she plans to reveal her own “dimpled butt” and receive endermologie treatment on the set.)
As a fatass, Banks went shopping, rode the bus and also had three blind dates, as this ABC News story details.
“One of them was so outright rude and hurtful!” she said of her dates.
Banks asked her date what his parents would think if he brought her home. He responded: “They’ll be like: ‘What’s wrong with you?’ “
When Banks revealed her real identity to a date, he went gaga. But, he still admitted that when he thought she was a 350-pound woman, he would not have gone out with her again.
Here’s where she totally loses credibility in this, if she had any to begin with.
Please, Tyra, tell me the last time you dated someone 350 lbs, or were even in the same room with one. Go ahead, promote the perfect body image to a generation of confused girls, then cash in by bashing the shallow behavior of others once those Victoria’s Secret looks start to go.
One-time Derek Jeter trophy girlfriend Vanessa Minnillo also donned the fat suit recently for Entertainment Tonight with predictable results.
“Turning myself into a 350-pound woman was eye-opening,” says Vanessa. “I knew that I would be able to take the suit off at the end of the day, but I never knew just how much it would affect me the first moment I saw how I looked.”
Why is 350 the magic number here? And is it me or are these fat-suit things totally noticeable?
Hey, Vanessa, if you really want to show your sympathy for fat people, I suggest dating a Yankees fan from the bleachers instead of a Yankee shortstop.
November 16th, 2005 at 1:13 pm
I had the same exact thought when I saw a clip of that Tyra show. Appearances matter when you are going on dates with people there honey; people need to be attracted to someone to date them. This is proven, Tyra, by the fact that I wouldn’t date an ugly fuck like you. Wait, flip that around.
A useful test would have been to go on a job interview in the fat suit with an impeccable resume and see if they did not give you the job. Then send a really hot and overtly stupid girl in there and see if they gave her a job. Then, Tyra, you’ve found a problem in our society. People only wanting to date other people that they find attractive is entirely defensible. If you were made fun of on the street, not served in a restaurant or helped in a store, or not given a job that you were qualified for, then we have a problem here.
November 16th, 2005 at 1:20 pm
Fat and stupid people have it the easiest of anybody — they don’t know and they obviously don’t care.
November 16th, 2005 at 1:26 pm
I hope Tyra gets stuck in her fatsuit…or better yet, i just hope she gets fat.
November 16th, 2005 at 6:48 pm
How the fuck fake does that suit look? No wonder these guys were squirming; probably thought they’d just landed Mork’s cousin Pork for Ork. Fuckin’ fashionistas. They can all go fuck themselves, shallow bitches. I’d still bang ‘em, of course. If I could.
May 20th, 2006 at 10:19 pm
Okay fuck all of you dickheads dissing Tyra banks…Only lord knows what you ugly mutha fuckas look like! I reckon shes cool and it was good of her to volunteer and show people what its really like for overweight and obese people around the world… some people can just be soo rude.